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Loving Olúgbàlà Through Honest Self Examination

This past year, I did not learn to love Olúgbàlà more by doing more religious activities. I learned by looking inward with honesty. Personal examination became a sacred tool in my prayer life  not to condemn myself, but to come into deeper alignment.

Prayer, for me, is no longer performance. It is a space where intimacy is built by truth. When I examine my life before Olódùmarè, I am not trying to impress heaven; I am opening myself to light.

This kind of prayer reveals where my life is not aligned with divine order not to shame me, but to invite transformation.
Psalm 139 is often reduced to two lines: “Search me” and “know my heart.” But the psalm itself gives a deeper foundation. It does not begin with inspection; it begins with assurance. It establishes that I am already known, already seen, already formed. 

That changes everything. Before self-examination begins, there is this truth: nothing about me is hidden from Olódùmarè. My journey did not start today. The Divine Presence has been present in my becoming through confusion, clarity, growth, and delay. Personal examination is safe because Olúgbàlà is not discovering me for the first time.
The psalm then moves into light. Not light that exposes to destroy, but light that reveals to heal. When truth enters, what was hidden becomes visible. In that visibility, I begin to understand myself properly not through fear, but through origin. I was intentionally formed. My life is not an accident. That knowledge gives courage to face my shadows.

Only after knowing I am known, seen, and intentionally created do I dare to pray, “Search me.” That prayer is not self-hatred; it is humility. It is asking Olódùmarè to reveal anything that blocks my true identity from flowing freely. Anything that distorts my original design. Anything that resists love, truth, or balance.

Personal examination works because Olúgbàlà is not shocked by what surfaces. There is no panic in heaven. There is power to redeem, heal, and reorder. The same light that reveals is the light that restores.
When I seek the truth of who Olódùmarè is, I become ready to see the truth of who I am without running, without pretending, without fear.
This is how intimacy deepens.
This is how alignment happens.
This is how love matures.

Aṣẹ.
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